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Beaches nowadays suffer from massive overcrowding, showcase particularly bad taste and have also become places of danger. Those of us from “proper” families know that we should never get into water straight after eating and that adequate attention should be paid to the flags on the beach placed there by lifeguards to denote the safe places to swim. But very few of us do the stretching and warm-up exercises that will ensure a proper and healthy swim. Mr Spicy and Mrs Hot will lead us through these beach traditions from bygone days. What every sensible and elegant bather should do before going for a dip in the sea.

1 sea star
2 frog
3 flamingo
4 buda yo-gaga
5 aurrescue
6 dirty dancing
7 give it to me baby
8 hot and spicy